Dr Science: The Three States of Matter

(Courtesy of Mason)

Dear Dr. Science,
What are the three states of matter?
from Dionne of London, England

(1) Things that don't matter at all,

(2) things that might matter if someone could be convinced to stop their incessant self-indulgent whining and pay even the smallest bit of attention to a problem that might not directly impact them, but might, in the long run, make all the difference in the world, and

(3) things that matter so much that no one can attend to them at all. Instead we all disassociate and go into a state of shock, focusing instead on Michael Jackson's skin color, or Ellen De Generis' sexuality, or vice versa. Maybe the Buddhists are right, maybe nothing matters in the long run except the long run.